The Inheritance

A Gift Becoming

Someone asked me the other day……

How did I come to possess the wisdom I hold, as he experienced it….not merely the knowledge itself, but the way in which it unfolds within me? What forces shaped my path, weaving the threads of my understanding into the fabric of my being? Of how I speak, write, and teach of the journey….of the trials and revelations that forged me into what I have become.

To answer that, I was drawn all the way back... to the very beginning.

It feels as though I arrived here on earth already tethered to another realm….one more fluid, ancient, and vast than the world beneath my feet. A realm woven with myth and mystery, where truth speaks not in rigid facts, but in symbols, archetypes, and the language of the soul. I understood that world instinctively, more so than the one I was born into. And that connection, present from the start, only deepened as I grew.

Like many children who experience profound trauma, I found myself leaving my body….floating beyond the weight of pain, beyond the edges of the known. It was the ultimate form of dissociation, a departure from the unbearable. But in that leaving, I did not vanish….I arrived.

I stepped into a place beyond the veil, a mythological expanse teeming with guides and guardians, goblins and fairies, beings who seemed to understand the very essence of my earthly experience. So, even as my body remained bound to this world, my spirit wandered elsewhere, gathering knowing, gathering wisdom.

At first, it was simply a means of survival. But over time, it became something more. A gift.

Later as I began to heal… through the labyrinth of addiction, trauma, PTSD... I found that I no longer needed to leave as much in order to receive wisdom. Instead, the wisdom came to me. It descended like a silent transmission from the unseen, a stream of understanding that poured itself into me effortlessly. Downloads, if you will. They would arrive fully formed, crystalline, untouched by thought… truths carried on the breath of something infinite.

When I come now to share that understanding, in speaking or writing something opens, a gateway, a portal where the wisdom enters from. The words flow, and later as I usually record those insights initially….I transcribe, refine, and shape them into what they are asking to become. But the essence is already there. It always was.

This process is not mine alone. I believe we all have themes… spiritual currents moving within us, shaping the way we see, feel, and express. These themes rise and fall within me, guiding the words that emerge, like waves bringing the deep to the surface.

And sometimes, when I’m speaking to others… whether to students, seekers, or kindred souls… the wisdom comes in real-time. I hear it as I say it, receiving and sharing in the same breath. There is a moment when something beyond language takes hold….a presence, a knowing that does not require words at all. If I could, I would convey it through music, vibration, through the very energy of being… because some truths are far too vast for language.

Many of the pieces I write have lived with me for decades, returning from the depths with new layers, new revelations. I retrieve them, weave in what has since been given, and release them again. It is a living process, a dance with the unseen. And I honor it.

Because in the end, all wisdom is a return. A return to Source. A return to Love.

Not love in the small, human sense, but Love as the Beloved, the Divine, the Origin of all things. The force that birthed us, sustains us, and calls us home.

And I have come to know this: Love heals all wounds. No matter how deep. No matter how vast.

All suffering can be returned to Source.

And in that returning, we remember.

We were never separate. We were never lost. We have always belonged.

Nigel Lott teaandzen.org